Over and over and over again, I hear the phrase, "Listen to your heart." It makes sense. I mean, I do believe everyone should do what they love in life, but how exactly do we know what our heart is telling us? I can only say from my own experience, but my heart has yet to pop out of my chest and tell me what to do. There is always the conflict of head and heart--this is something I can easily relate to--but how can we know which is the correct way to go?
I don't think we really can know exactly what our heart is telling us because we have so much hustle and bustle in the world around us, preventing us to hear only what we need. I think this is where faith comes in. God is in all of our hearts and regardless of what we are thinking, hearing, or believe our heart is telling us, God will make sure we do what is needed to stay on the path we need. You know that little voice in the back of your head that is screaming the answer but you're not sure if you should listen to it? DO!! That is God telling you what you need to pick. Lord knows I don't always listen to that voice, and sometimes I feel the voice contradicts itself, but you need to have faith in that voice. Even if you don't listen to it, God already knows it and will always be there when you need him. He is even there when you think you don't, sending signs and telling you what will help you best throughout your life.
Take today for example. I have been praying to know if I should keep waiting for the same boy I have been waiting on for close to two years now. I say boy because--despite the fact that he's 20--he has yet to grow enough that his mom's opinion doesn't affect every decision he makes. Not that his relationship with his mom is a bad thing, but he has yet to act in a way different than what his mom tells him to do. That is why him and I are now back to just friends instead of the relationship I have wanted for so long. I was praying last night, asking God to just let me know if it is His will to keep holding onto my feelings, or if He wants me to move on. Then, while I was watching the first episode of the fifth season of Dawson's Creek, He gave me my answer. It's time to cut the cord. Joey and Dawson have had a ongoing relationship/romance/friendship since they were 15. They are now freshman in college and Joey realized she needs to cut the cord and stop holding onto the past. Joey was waiting for Dawson to just show up at her door, but he hadn't. Even though he ended up at her door at the end of the episode, I feel God was sending me a message that I need to cut the cord with Ben (the boy who crushed my heart). I don't think our friendship is going to end, but the possibility of something more than friends.
I don't know if cutting the cord is the ultimate ending in the story of Ben and me, but for now, I do think that is the answer. I cannot tell you how much better I felt after I came to this realization.
I know I seem to contradict myself in this article, but I do believe one must listen to his/her heart, but I think it's impossible to know exactly what it is telling you. God is in your heart and will tell you what you need to do, but it is still our own free will to decide for ourselves what to do. Regardless of what we do, God already knows what it will be and will be there for us every step of the way.
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